This week, Match.com announced a partnership that could allow you to find a date that looks like your ex. And all you have to do is fork over $5,000 for access to the facial recognition technology! Yep, you read those zeros correctly.
Match will be partnering with Three Day Rule, an LA-based matchmaking start-up, to provide additional services for singles who seek a customized "white-glove approach to dating." One of the many elements of TDR's unique method is a facial recognition software that uses pictures of ex-girlfriends or boyfriends to gauge the face shape clients are most attracted to. (Who knew face shape was a turn-on?)
"People have a type and it's not necessarily about height or race or hair color, but a lot of it is about face shape," Talia Goldstein, the founder of Three Day Rule, told Mashable.
Intriguing. We got on the phone with sex and relationship expert, Ian Kerner, Ph.D. to see if he would encourage online daters to find a match that looks like an old flame. Spoiler alert: Probably not. Here are four reasons to consider deviating from your “type."
1. You can trust your own instincts: Looking for a physical type you know you like isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but we don’t need filtering technology to do that for us, Kramer says. “People are capable of making those decisions. The human eye is the best filter out there. It’s called “thin splicing”—you look at something and have a gut intuition within a split second.”
2. Stepping out of your comfort zone is exciting: We all approach dating with our frames, or what we’re looking for, Kramer says. Frames are formed by people we’ve dated in the past, who our parents would like us to date, or the media. However, by walking around with a tight frame, you’re missing other possibilities out there. Opening yourself up to “types” you’ve never considered before is key to finding out what you really want in a partner. Plus, it’s fun!
3. You probably won’t marry your 'type': “I’ve worked with hundreds of thousands of couples and I’ve found people have been completely surprised with who they’ve fallen in love with,” says Kerner. Sure, looks and chemistry are a good way to begin—and many people seek out consistent physical attributes—but things like interests, the way someone presents themselves, sense of humor, intelligence, education, and goals are what really matters.
4. Your ex is your ex for a good reason: “Trying to recreate that relationship or find a clone of your ex is faulty psychology,” Kramer says. “If you’re hung up on your ex, looking for him won’t help you get over him. And if you are over him, you should be looking for new possibilities,” he says. (Plus, isn’t the thought of accidentally calling your new boyfriend by your ex’s name already stressful enough?)