Healthy Relationship Advice: Get Closer
Shape shares four pieces of free relationship advice to help you get closer – and stay closer – to your guy.
1. Find nonverbal ways to connect with your partner after a fight.
Bring him a cold drink, for instance, or just give him a hug. According to Patricia Love, Ed.D., and Steven Stosny, Ph.D., co-authors of How to Improve Your Marriage Without Talking About It, feelings of fear and shame drain blood from the area of the brain that regulates language, making it less likely for you to clearly express what you mean.
2. Do something nice for your significant other's family and friends.
You might, for example, help his sister find an internship or invite his parents over for dinner. This is a powerful bonding technique because it shows your guy that you care about the people who are important to him, too, says Daniel G. Amen, M.D., author of Sex on the Brain.
3. Stay in the present.
Obsessing about what might happen if you take your relationship to the next level could rob you of happiness, says Elina Furman, author of Kiss and Run. Instead, ask yourself, "Am I getting what I want out of the relationship at this moment?" If the answer's yes, moving forward might not be as risky as you think.
4. Take 10.
"Close the door on the pressures of the day-sit down and read a chapter of a novel, sip some wine, or talk to your mate," says Pepper Schwartz, Ph.D., a sex therapist and contributor to perfectmatch.com. "You have the ability to transition like this-say, if you had a chaotic morning at work and have to compose yourself before an important meeting-you just have to apply the same strategy to your relationships."