An underactive libido may be a sign of underlying issues in the relationship. “Often women don’t say anything when they’re upset with their partners,” says Hutcherson. Ask yourself if you’re harboring any resentments. If so, voice them, and be specific. What could your guy—and you—do differently to make you happier? If the reward for having a difficult conversation is a better sex life, there’s a pretty good chance he’ll listen up.