Sending your boyfriend sexy text messages can increase communication—and satisfaction between the sheets
Forget talking dirty in the bedroom—talking dirty digitally is what really gets us going, says new research. People who sext are more satisfied sexually, according to new research presented at the American Psychological Association's annual convention. (Well, that's a reason to learn how to do it right if we've ever heard one! Read these 5 Sexting Tips Every Woman Needs to Know.)
The good news? Looks like most of us are already doing it: In a survey of more than 800 people, researchers from Drexel University found that more than eight in 10 people aged 18 to 86 admit to sending and receiving sexts—either raunchy words or racy pics—in the last year alone. That's right, you and grandma may have something more in common than a shared nose or love of gardening (although we recommend sticking to the topics related to the latter over Thanksgiving dinner). (Find out What Girl Talk with Your Grandma Can Teach You About Healthy Relationships.)
What used to be considered shady, secretive behavior is now not only acceptable but also the norm. And that's a good thing—especially if you're in a serious relationship. People who loved to send steamy texts and who also described their status as "very committed" were more satisfied in their relationships as well as between the sheets.
However, the pros only held true for those already involved with their future fella. For all the single ladies, sexting actually decreased sexual satisfaction, indicating that it might be harmful in establishing a healthy relationship, but helpful in maintaining one.
In the past, sexting has gotten a bad rap as the go-to method of cheaters and hornballs, the study authors pointed out. (Paging Anthony Weiner!) But their data actually shows that 75 percent of sexy texters did so in the context of a committed relationship and only 11 percent 'fessed up to using it to cheat. And while previous research has linked sexting to other risky sexual behaviors like unprotected sex, the Drexel researchers added that this shouldn't discount the benefit of giving couples more ways to openly communicate about sex. (And this simple step can actually increase your O. Find out more in Have an Amazing Orgasm: Talk It Out.)
So fire up those phones! Eggplant emojis for all!