"It makes you a better mom if you give yourself a better time."
Adele is usually a fiercely private celebrity, but recently she opened up in a new interview with Vanity Fair about her struggles with postpartum depression. The singer, who gave birth to now 4-year-old Angelo in 2012, says that while she loves being a mother, she struggled for months after his birth with feelings of inadequacy and guilt.
"My knowledge of postpartum — or post-natal, as we call it in England — is that you don't want to be with your child; you're worried you might hurt your child; you're worried you weren't doing a good job," she said. "But I was obsessed with my child. I felt very inadequate; I felt like I'd made the worst decision of my life . . . . It can come in many different forms."
Talking with friends helped, she says. "One day I said to a friend, 'I fuckin' hate this,' and she just burst into tears and said, 'I fuckin' hate this, too.' And it was done. It lifted."
Another thing that helped was taking time for herself without Angelo, something Adele says she was initially reluctant to do, especially after one of her friends asked her if she felt "bad" about doing so. "I said, I do, but not as bad as I'd feel if I didn't do it," she told VF. "Four of my friends felt the same way I did, and everyone was too embarrassed to talk about it; they thought everyone would think they were a bad mom, and it's not the case. It makes you a better mom if you give yourself a better time."
Well-said. It's estimated that postpartum depression affects around 16 percent of childbearing women, and it's nothing to be ashamed of. We're glad that Adele is shedding some light on this important issue.