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New TIME Facebook App Tells You When You Should Get Married (and Makes You Hate Yourself)


Is your Facebook feed flooded with status updates about babies and impending marriages? Do you feel bad every time you go home and your kind great-aunt asks you, "So, are you seeing anyone special?" Do you passive-aggressively refuse to like any status that claims, "He liked it so he put a ring on it!"?

Well, just in case you needed another reason to feel bad about yourself (and right before Valentine's Day, natch), TIME magazine has designed an app that highlights just how far behind the curve you are when it comes to marriage and babies (because, of course, you weren't already acutely aware).

By analyzing your Facebook friends' relationship statuses compared to yours as well as your age, the app pinpoints exactly when you should be walking down the aisle.

According to TIME, the app "measures the median age of your married friends, meaning the person for whom half your married friends are younger and half are older. Because you are probably friends with a lot of people close to your age, this figure will theoretically identify whether you have passed the point where many of your contemporaries start tying the knot. It will work better for some than others."

RELATED: How to Tell If He's The One

Does it work? I wouldn't know, because I tried to use the app twice, and each time it crashed my Internet, so no word on whether I get to figure out when the perfect time for me to get hitched is. I can't figure out if this is a sign from the universe that I need to get my love life together or that I pin too much to my hypothetical wedding board or if I should just give up now and get a lot of cats, but I guess I'll have a lot of time to think about it this Valentine's Day. #foreveralone


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