Lena Dunham Explains Why She's Happier Than Ever at Her Heaviest Weight
She wrote an Instagram post about all the ways she's been told she's "too much"—and why she no longer cares.
Lena Dunham is back with another deep Instagram caption, this time about what it takes to reach self-acceptance. (Related: Lena Dunham Shares How Getting Tattoos Helps Her Take Ownership of Her Body)
Yesterday, the Girls alum revealed that she's spent too long feeling like "too much"-in every sense of the phrase. "I've spent a lot of time in this life feeling like too much," she wrote in the caption alongside a photo of herself in her underwear. "Too hungry. Too anxious. Too loud. Too needy. Too sick. Too dramatic. Too honest. Too sexy (jk lol.) I was always sent the message, in insidious ways, that I took up too much room and demanded too much from life and sometimes gave too much to people who didn't want any at all."
Swap in your own adjectives, but chances are, you can relate; her experience is universal. No matter how you live your life, you'll likely get subtle (or outright) nudges to tone something down at one point or another. (This is, in part, the point this recent Nike commercial was making about women in sports being told they are crazy or irrational for showing emotion.)
She went on to explain that she's finally realized she doesn't need to live her life seeking anyone's approval. "At 32: I weigh the most I ever have," she wrote. "I love the most I ever have. I read and write and laugh the most I ever have. And I'm the happiest I've ever been. Not the frail, precarious happiness of 'things are going perfectly.' The big, generous, jiggly happiness of 'I think I'm finally starting to get the hang of this.'" (Related: Lena Dunham Had a Full Hysterectomy to Stop Her Endometriosis Pain)
This isn't the first time Dunham has given the middle finger to society's expectations.
After her weight loss in 2017 landed her on the cover of Us Weekly next to the words "20 Slimdown Diet Tips!" she wrote her own list of 20 reasons why she lost weight, citing things like having an anxiety disorder and having her phone number leaked. "I have no tips, I give no tips, I don't want to be on this cover cuz it's diametrically opposed to everything I've fought my whole career for and it's not a compliment to me because it's not an achievement thanx," she wrote in the post.
Similarly, last year, she posted a before-and-after photo showcasing her weight gain. In the earlier photo (when she weighed less), she got compliments and tabloid attention, but in the later photo, she was "happy, joyous, and free," she wrote.
With her latest post-where she weighs more than ever before and is happier than ever before-Dunham pointed out that getting to her current mindset wasn't a quick and easy process, but it was definitely worth the effort.