Whether you're a cycling pro or newbie rider, you know that in spinning, the mental workout is just as intense (and sometimes, hilarious) as the physical
Advertisement

Between the warm-up and the cool-down, there's way more going on in spin class than just sprints and jumps. Indoor cycling can be hilarious, bizarre, and a straight-up struggle. On the outside? You're a smiling, glowing champ. On the inside? Things are a little different. You may not be saying much out loud other than "Woo!" but listen: We know. We've been there, we get it, and we've listed the 30 most common thoughts you have while the sweat's flying.

Water: Check. Top bun: Check. Hilariously tiny towel: Check. Bring it on, Wednesday-at-7!

irtp.gif

I'm sorry-a sub? The website clearly stated that David would be teaching. Hot David. This is a waste of my best workout shorts.

Hillary-Duff.gif

Wait, yes-it's Jen, the woman who only plays diva jams, as opposed to David's kinda-cult-y House music. We're golden.

tumblr_mvhll8w28j1s9csv8o1_500.gif

Oh. That girl thinks she can use my bike? That's cute. That's cute. I'll see you after class, High Pony.

ali.gif

Listen, early birds, I'd be here earlier to warm up with you but I have a life. ...Okay, I was polishing off a bag of pita chips pre-class. SO?!

rpaul.gif

Why, yes, Jen, I do know how to adjust my bike! Haha...wait, what does this pulley do again?

tumblr_m6baiu1S8S1r8wx07.gif

Oh. Hello. This seat is giving me more below-the-belt action than I've seen in a while.

giphy.gif

Alright, I am ready to ri-what's that, Jen? I'll damage my knees forever if I don't lower my seat? ...I knew that.

news.gif

Knew I shouldn't have worn this top. My pits can't breathe.

Knew I shouldn't have worn these shorts. The chafing will be real.

tumblr_nbvhmvwrj01qgkcmbo9_500.gif

Knew I shouldn't have worn these shoes. I'm coming out of this with like, 4 toes total.

limp.gif

Those windows are tinted, right? But I feel like they're not. Jen, the street-people can see us, I swear.

meal-girls.gif

I will never be coordinated enough to spin and stretch my arms above my head.

tfey.gif

Why did she just lower the lights? What exactly does that do for my struggles?

...Why is there a disco ball?

resize.gif

Just nod. Nod like you know what "jumps" and "hills" and "intervals" all mean.

smile-nod.gif

Why does that woman have two towels? Does she know something I don't?

blanche.gif

Omg, hatethissonghatethissong HATE. THIS. SONG. [Spins faster.]

tumblr_mmwag5inmy1rdhteno1_500.gif

Omg, lovethissonglovethissong LOVE. THIS. SOOOOONG. [Spins faster.]

car-dance.gif

No one has ever asked me to "pump to the beat" of "Timber" before. Gotta remember to tell the girls about this one.

tumblr_inline_mlv73ulplu1qz4rgp.gif

[Jumps, lands in the seat wrong.] Aaaand there goes my ability to procreate.

mosh-pit.gif

Don't look at the speed of the person next to you. Don't look. Don't... EASE UP, LANCE ARMSTRONG, THIS IS AN OPEN LEVEL CLASS.

giphy.gif

I. Did not know. I had sweat glands there.

wet-dog.gif

Do I look good sweaty? Some people look good sweaty. He looks good sweaty. Do I?

mob-sweating.gif

I feel like I'm burning off enough calories to date back to like, Thanksgiving Dinner...circa 1984.

jazzercise.gif

"INCREASE RESISTANCE!" [Spins hand around knob without touching it.]

shh.gif

I'm actually afraid of what my ladyparts might look like after this. [Glances down.] I'm so sorry, m'am.

giphy.gif

FOR GOD'S SAKE, SOMEONE TURN ON THE FANS, THAT'S WHAT THEY'RE THERE FOR, LET THEM DO THEIR JOB.

giphy.gif

[During a sprint.] I am Beyonce. Beyonce is me. I am Beyonce. Beyonce is me.

giphy.gif

That was not 30 seconds. In what world was that 30 seconds? Who taught you how to count seconds?!

judge-judy.gif

Jen is the woman whose parking spot I swooped on last week. I knew it. It's the only explanation for her apparent hatred and this unending torture.

If this bike is stationary, why do I feel like I've traveled to the depths of my personal hell?

why-god.gif

"Aaand ease off on the resistance, great job!" [Basically turns bike off and all but walks the hell out of there.]

UXF8FEw.gif

Do they call it "spinning" because the room is now spinning? No? Just me?

pass-out.gif

Ahh. That wasn't so bad. Now that my heart rate's back to You Might Not Die, I may actually sort of rock at this.

beyonce.gif

WHAT DO YOU MEAN THAT WAS JUST THE WARM-UP?!

theresaG.gif