"I didn't think I had the body to rock a bikini, especially in front of a man with a body like his."

By Faith Brar
Updated: July 28, 2017

Bathing suit anxiety is real-and no one understands that better than fitness blogger Nikki (@naturally.nikki_). So much so that she pretended to forget her bikini at home on one of her first dates with a man she eventually fell in love with.

"A year and a half ago on one of our first dates he took me to Zuma beach in Malibu," Nikki recently revealed in a candid Instagram post. "I 'forgot' my bikini. I didn't want to be in a bikini on the beach, I thought he wouldn't like me." (Related: Top 10 Ways to Boost Body Confidence)

Some of Nikki's insecurities stemmed from the fact that in her mind, the guy she was with appeared to be much more fit than she was. "I didn't think I had the body to rock a bikini-especially in front of a man with a body like his," she explained. "I was so confused as to why he was into me.... How messed up is that!?" (Related: Why This Body Positive Blogger Loves Her Loose Skin)

Fast-forward to today, and Nikki is happily in love with the same man she thought wouldn't appreciate her because of things she didn't like about herself. "I wish I changed my mindset earlier in life and rocked my bikini and enjoyed that beach date with him rather than being insecure the whole time in a DRESS on the beach," she said. "He has been there by my side on my journey and loved me no matter what (he fell in love with me 25lbs heavier)."

Now Nikki focuses on finding happiness through the lifestyle she lives rather than through the way she looks. "I am not trying to change my body to please anyone but myself," she says. "I love living a healthy lifestyle and watching how strong my body is becoming! I'm not perfect-nobody is. I feel so happy and confident and that's all that matters."



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