April 28, 2009

You know that you want and need to spice up your sex life, but you aren't sure how. Shape has surprising tips for you that really work!

Tips to improve sex life, # 1. Have more fun in bed

To spice up your sex life, skip the lingerie and buy sneakers instead. People who regularly work up a sweat outside the bedroom feel more sexually desirable, finds a study at the University of Arkansas. Other research from Duke University Medical Center shows that when overweight men and women lost just 10 percent of their body weight, they enjoyed sex more. Get moving and watch your between-the-sheets confidence soar.

Tips to improve sex life, # 2. Limit your TV time

New research from Purdue University reveals that people who chat while the TV is blaring look at their companions 36 percent less often than they do when it's turned off-and that results in a less satisfying exchange. "Even if TV serves as background noise, you're distracted," says study author Glenn Sparks, professor of communication. His recommendation: Watch only the shows you truly love. "With the set turned off the rest of the time," says Sparks, "you'll create more opportunities for conversation and be able to focus on your loved one as you talk."

Tips to improve sex life, # 3. Laugh together

Laughter can lower blood pressure and burn calories, but it may also strengthen your bond with your guy. According to a new study in the journal Motivation and Emotion, couples who reminisced about sharing a laugh were more satisfied with their relationships than those who didn't. "Laughing together builds a supply of good memories," says lead author Doris Bazzini. "You'll call on it later, when times get tough."

For two more great tips on how to spice up your sex life and the strategies that will help make them happen, read on![header = Wondering how to spice up your sex life? Here are two more terrific tips.]

Shape provides two more terrific tips on how to spice up your sex life and we also include strategies on how to make that happen.

Tips to improve sex life, # 4. Communicate better

Some people say you shouldn't have serious conversations in the bedroom, but it can be one of the best places for couples to reconnect without distractions. Here are some communication-improving (and improve sex life!) tips:

* Set aside time to just talk in bed. Though many couples find nighttime the most convenient, others may prefer to have coffee together in bed in the a.m.

* Put the cell phones in another room; then turn off the computers, PDAs, and the ringer on the landline.

* Keep it positive. Never start the conversation with an accusation or question, advises Sally. So instead of saying, "Why don't we ever go out anymore?" try, "I wish we could spend more time together."

* Don't rule any topic out of bounds. It's all about reconnecting once a day, without any outside distractions. And who knows, she says, a great conversation may lead to something else!

Tips to improve sex life, # 5. Get your finances in order

Don't let financial secrets come between the two of you! "Many couples aren't on the same page financially," says Lois Vitt, co-author of You and Your Money: A No-Stress Guide to Becoming Financially Fit. "And unresolved money issues can potentially lead to divorce."

The key to overcoming differences? Open communication. Vitt offers these solutions to three common clashes.

* You love to splurge; he's Fred Frugal

Come up with savings and spending regimens. The shopaholic will have discretionary dollars so she doesn't feel deprived, while the saver can be confident there will be money for emergencies and the future.

* You pay off your credit cards every month; he's in debt up to his Humvee

Work together. Sit down and list everything he owes. Pay off items with the highest interest rates first, then transfer balances to lower-rate cards. Make a pact to stop using credit for frills like dining out and big-ticket items like a flat-screen TV (save up for them instead).

* You can account for every penny you spend; he tosses receipts

When you share a bank account, be aware of both your income and expenses. If your man isn't a spreadsheet guy, volunteer to play accountant, but include him in the process.

There is no need to wait! Spice up your sex life with these terrific tips today.