8 Things That Might Gross Guys Out In Bed
TBH, most guys won't give a flying condom about any of these—but everyone's different.
You're naked, he's naked, and you're both aroused. The smells, sweat, and sounds can suddenly seem erotically charged-to you, that is. In an Archives of Sexual Behavior study, women who were aroused felt significantly less grossed out by things they normally might be freaked out by. But dudes' level of disgust stayed exactly the same, even in the heat of the moment.
The good news: Men tend to have pretty low levels of "icky" feelings about sex to start with, the scientists say. But what actually grosses a guy out in bed? Of course, all men like and dislike different things in bed, but science says that these things may be more likely to bother your partner. (There's a good chance they'll love anything in these male erogenous zones, though.)
You Hit the Sack Post-Workout
In an Evolution and Human Behavior study, men said an unpleasant body odor influences their sexual attraction more than the sound of a woman's voice, the feel of her skin, or her life ambitions. What's the big deal about a little B.O.? Body odor can convey that you aren't taking care of yourself (even if you are), says DeAnna Lorraine, a dating and relationships coach in Los Angeles. But let's be real: You don't love his stink post-gym session either, right?
The good news is sweating together can turn you both on. (Try strength training specifically, which is the best workout to boost your sex drive.) Instead of climbing into bed immediately after a workout, though, hop in the shower together.
Your Breath Is Rough
If you just downed a plate of garlic bread with your guy or it's first thing in the AM (morning sex, anyone?), he'll probably be forgiving if you're not exactly minty fresh. (Although, in a recent Appetite study, both sexes said garlic is a no-no when you're on a date.) The problem comes when bad breath (a.k.a. halitosis) is chronic-in that case, it may actually act as a barrier to intimacy. When you're suffering from a serious case of bad breath, this can definitely act as a roadblock to sex, says Lorraine. (Related: Is Your Guy Normal When It Comes to Sex?)
A Lack of Confidence
Acting skittish about stripping down, pushing him away when he goes down on you, or being totally silent in bed are all signs of sexual insecurity-and big-time buzzkills for your guy too, says Lorraine. Why is bedroom bravado so critical? "Confidence indicates that you know yourself well and know what you like," explains Justin Sitron, Ph.D., a professor of human sexuality at Widener University. "Letting him take charge can be fun, but you need to show him that you're equally into it," adds Lorraine. A worthy partner will enjoy making you feel pleasure, so don't feel shy about telling him (or her!) what you like and don't like.
That said, this isn't all about what guys like in bed; embracing your body and sexual confidence both in the bedroom and elsewhere in your life can only bring good things. Start with positive self-talk and learn what you like with some solo masturbation sessions.
You're On Your Period-But Don't Give Him a Warning
In 2014, 60 percent of women reported not being comfortable having sex during their period, according to a survey by Softcup. But times have officially changed: a 2017 survey of 500 people by the FLEX Company (the company behind this period-sex disc) found that 55 percent of people think having sex on your period is "natural" or "awesome" and that 30 percent want to do it more-and that survey included men.
If you're chill with it? Amazing-just make sure your guy is on board too. "Most mature men are understanding," says Lorraine, but you should still give him a head's up. Your line: "Just to let you know, it's that time of the month. We can hold off, or we can go for it." (Then use this guide on how to have period sex and try these best sex positions for period sex, and use this period sex blanket if you don't want to make a mess. )
You Talk Really Dirty
Dirty talk is practically the norm: 80 percent of people admit to incorporating aural arousal into sex, according to a survey by sex toy company Adam & Eve. Twelve percent even said dirty talk is always part of sex. (And that's a great thing: Open communication about sex has been linked to more satisfaction.) But just because it's normal doesn't mean your partner is prepared to push the envelope. Going overboard without warning can be a turn-off. Talk about what works for both of you in bed before you step things up.
Your Vagina Smells a Little Off
Your guy likely wants to go down on you. (Yes, really!!) It's only when things seem a little funky that a gross factor can set in. It's not just in the name of vanity: Men may be wired to be repulsed since a smelly vagina can signal an infection.
If your vagina smells more or differently than normal, it may be one of these health issues. Otherwise, know that a little odor is normal and that you don't need to clean your vulva and vagina with special soaps or other products. Most guys will find your natural scent to be a turn on-and if they don't, it's likely a them problem, not a you problem.
You Pee with the Door Open
One of the best parts of getting intimate is that you're, well, intimate with someone else. However, there's a line between comfortable and too comfortable.
Truth: That glorious post-coital glow can be hampered by the sound of urine tinkling in the toilet (for either sexes, that is!). Men can be weird about the fact that the vaginal area serves several purposes, the same way it might not be a turn-on to think about the other uses of your guy's penis, says Lorraine. As Sitron explains, during sex, we separate ourselves from reality-and when you're still getting to know each other, you rely heavily on that fantasyland for intimacy. That's not to say you shouldn't hit the bathroom after sex-just give yourself some privacy.
You Kiss Him Right After Going Down On Him
For some guys, this is no biggie-but for others, not so much. (Ditto for women!) "Some people see vaginal fluids and cum as separate kinds of bodily fluids that are sensual or sexy," says Sitron. But some people find them to be a little gross.
While you shouldn't feel shame about your body's natural processes, you (and your partner) are certainly entitled to a preference about post-oral kisses. It's worth a convo before swooping in for one.