The Best Anal Sex Positions for Beginner to Advanced Play
Anal Sex for All!
You know that iconic moment when Oprah gave away a car to everyone in the audience? Well, with all the jibber-jabber about anal as of late, I like to imagine her saying, "You get to try anal! And you get to try anal! And you get to try anal!".
Sound crazy? Let me remind you that, considering 36 percent of adult women have tried anal sex, there are more people indoctrinated into the Anal Sex Club than there are who own cats! Or are vegans/vegetarians! Or actually like Crocs!
And there's a reason: It feels good. It can even be orgasmic. "Anal penetration can be really enjoyable and pleasurable for people with vulvas," says Alicia Sinclair, certified sex educator and CEO of b-Vibe, an anal play product company. That's thanks to a combo of sensitive nerves around the anus and the fact that anal penetration directly stimulates the A-spot and can indirectly hit the G-spot, she says.
If you've never explored anal before, but are intrigued (which I'm guessing you are, since you're reading this) first check out this guide on How to Prepare for Anal Sex, According to Experts and then circle back. If you're already part of the club, welcome. Regardless, this selection of anal sex positions offers something for all levels.
The next time you and your partner get it on, grab the lube (lots of it!), ramp up the foreplay, and then try your hand (er, butt) at one of these sexpert-recommended positions. Trust, you'll be glad you did.
Plugs In The Tub
If you already know that you like anal sex, skip down to the other anal sex positions on this list. But for folks who are just learning about the anus's pleasure potential, experimenting with butt plugs—either with a partner or solo—is a great place to start.
Just remember: Any time you put something in your booty, you want it to be a toy intended for ass-play. "Unlike the vagina, where the cervix will stop a toy from going too far, the anal canal has no stopper to keep a toy from being sucked in. So, the flared base on butt plugs is crucial for safe anal play," explains Sinclair. Noted. (Here's a full guide to the best anal sex toys.)
There's no better place for plug play than the shower, especially for first-timers. "For folks who are just starting to experiment with butt play, the shower often feels like a 'safe' place to try in case things get messy," says Sinclair. "Plus, heat from the shower can help relax your muscles (including your sphincter)."
If you have a partner, try stimulating your clitoris with a (waterproof) vibrator or your own fingers while your partner teases your back door with the butt plug. Or, let your partner take over entirely, performing oral sex while easing in the plug.
If you're on your own, perform your usual masturbation ritual (maybe even making yourself orgasm), before teasing your hole. (Related: 13 Masturbation Tips for Mind-Blowing Solo Session).
Receiver On Top
"The anal sex best position for people who are new is one that allows you to be in complete and total control," explains Evan Goldstein, M.D., CEO and founder of Bespoke Surgical, which specializes in helping men and women engage in anal play. "That's why I say on-top is a preferred way to start—it allows you to control the angle of your pelvis and overall depth of insertion."
Ready to get into position? Have your partner lay on their back, lightly holding your hips while you straddle them. Once you and your partner are lubed up, reach between your partner's legs and hold them to your entrance. Then, slide down at your own pace. (See more: Everything You Need to Know About Lube).
Don't be afraid to experiment with the angle, says Goldstein. Try leaning your torso forward, and even kissing your partner. Try leaning back slightly, placing your hands behind you on your partner's thighs or knees if needed. Try tilting your pelvis forward, and then back. "Everyone's pleasure point is different, but the angle of your pelvis could stimulate your G-spot or your A-spot, or both, so play around with it," he says. And if you enjoy clitoral play, feel free to ask your partner to get their hands in on the action.
Face-to-face booty banging offers the possible intimacies of eye-contact and kissing. And, because the penetrator can see the receiver's face, there's the benefit of non-verbal communication. "During the initial stages of anal sex, it's a nice way to learn to read each other in order to minimize pain and maximize pleasure," adds Dr. Goldstein. (Everyone has an "ouch!" and "ooh yeah!" face.)
Since this anal sex position doesn't give the receiving partner full control, he recommends saving this for the second or third time. When you've done your "homework" and are ready to try it, start by getting into classic missionary position: If you're the one receiving, lay on your back and have your partner lay between your legs. When you're ready to be penetrated, draw your knees to your chest, to help open your body up. (BTW: Here's why foreplay matters before any type of sex.)
Remember: "It ain't about shoving it in!" says Dr. Goldstein. "It's about understanding your anatomy, perfecting the synergy between the bodies involved, and not rushing it." Start slowly and increasing depth bit by bit.
Another tip? Reach between your legs play with your clit, or tease your nipples. Or you might a clit suction vibe, which usually feels tantalizing on nipples as well.
Down South Doggy
Turn this classic sex position into an anal experience by having your partner aim a little more, uh, South.
Here's how it works: Start by teasing your clitoris. You might use your fingers, a hand-held vibe like the Le Wand Petite, or the Eva II, which secures to the labia and can provide continuous stimulation when you get to the anal penetration. "So many people forget to stimulate their favorite pleasure-spots while experimenting with anal penetration and I believe front body stimulation enhances the pleasure of back door penetration," says Sinclair.
Next, lube up and have your partner press the tip of their penis or dildo against your opening. When you're ready, press back against them and feel yourself accepting the heft. Work with your partner to find a pace and rhythm that feels pleasurable. "Communicate with your partner about what feels good and what's working, so they can be sure to be active in making it a pleasurable experience," suggests Sinclair. (Related: 8 Common Communication Problems In Relationships).
A slightly more "advanced" iteration of this anal sex position is to drop onto your elbows. "Keeping your hips above your shoulders spreads the butt cheeks and gives easier access," explains Sinclair. And, it avoids putting extra pressure on the wrists like hands and knees regular doggy. Cheers to completely pain-free sex.
Any spoon position is going to be cozy AF—and comfort is especially clutch during anal sex. "When the body is comfortable, it's easier for it to relax the muscles around the anus," explains Sinclair.
Lay on your side, with the penetrating partner wrapped behind you, big-spoon style. "Try bending your upper leg at the knee and hip, and placing it on a pillow, to make entry easier," she says.
The great thing about this position is you both have a degree of control. Work together to find a rhythm that's enjoyable for both of you. And, of course, always add in hands! You might even use one of these vibrators which are great to use with a partner. (Speaking of sex toys, here's how to clean 'em.)
Feeling adventurous? If you have a stool and your roommate is out for the evening, try this advanced anal position outside the bedroom. "Because it's not taking place in the bed, this position adds mental excitement, which is exhilarating because the brain is one of women's biggest most powerful erogenous zones," says Allison.
If you're the receiving partner, start by sitting on a bar stool so that your booty is off the back. Now, lean forward, using your hands between your legs for balance. Your partner is going to stand behind you, and place their hands on your hips so that the stool doesn't tip over. "You're perfectly positioned to play with your own nipples and clitoris. If you touch yourself and you might even experience a blended orgasm," she says.
If you don't like it or want more control of the depth, have your partner take a seat! Facing away from them, slide down and enjoy some reverse chair anal play. (Or, if you're not feeling anal tonight, try this position with vaginal penetration to mix things up.)
This is a slightly higher-skill anal sex position that's "great if your partner or the dildo being used are on the smaller side, or you trust your partner and are feeling adventurous," says Sadie Allison, Ph.D., founder TickleKitty.com sex toy boutique and author of Tickle My Tush: Mild-to-Wild Analplay Adventures for Everybooty
. It requires that the receiving partner to get into a squat-like position, which "leaves the anus open," says Allison.
If you're the receiver, you're going to stand on the edge of the bed, and then lower down into a deep squat. Now, lean forward slightly, so that your hands some-what steady on your feet and hands. "You partner can now use their hands to hold you in place, and thrust at the speed and rhythm you like," says Allison. Just know that it's going to be possible to go deeper because the anus is going to be more open than in some of the other positions on this list—communication is key. (Related: Is It Possible for a Penis to Be Too Big?)
Oh, and because your clitoris will be fully exposed in the squat position, take advantage! "You might have your partner pause the thrusting, and wrap their arm around your body to play," she suggests.